September 3rd, 2025 - Withdrawal!!

Hello I am writing from class. When I'm home I never want to write. I was going through a bit of an abstinence from my medicine because I was too lazy to go buy a new box but now It's getting better. That plsu the flu and an unbearable pain in my lower back resulted in a miserable weekend. I also forgot my clothes in the drier so they all smelled like mould when I got them out. I scattered the clothes around my apartment and opened the window in hopes that would fix it. Just terrible last few days altogether. My apartment is still a mess and I haven't folded the clothes. Need to clean the floor too.
There's this guy that I used to be friends with you know, the french fry guy who I had a fight with. He started messaging me on discord like nothing ever happened! Turns out he needed a place to crash in the big city for this music festival he's going with his friends. I do not want him here. I think I really am done with this friendship. Still, I feel bad for saying he can't stay here. But I really am not comfortable. There are so many things he's done and a lot of them I cannot blame him for, but they still make me feel icky. I feel ready to really shut that door.
My appetite has been lacking recently and I think It's because of the withdrawal...when I start losing interest in food that's how I know I'm on my way to a downward spiral. I've been taking double the dose to make up for it but I know that's not how it works. Taking more meds won't make them act any faster. I think I just want to be happier. aaaAAH...