March 21st,2026 -

I'm feeling upset.
I will not talk about the one thing I've forbidden myself from writing about but rest assured, it's on my mind. If you know me and if you've read my entries before you'll probably know what it is.
I feel overwhelmed so I took a break from talking to people, at least on discord. I just don't have the power to respond to anything right now. I didn't go to the club yesterday after all, I was too sleepy and tired. If only I could uber there without spending so much...it's just so far away. Still, I knew I'd feel bad today for not going to the depeche mode special. God, It would've felt amazing to listen to my favorite tracks. Welp...they have a depeche mode cover show next week so I can still go haha. But I didn't want to listen to the cover band because they perform in another, well-lit area of the club. Not a good place to dance in unless you're drunk. And I won't be drunk. I'm hoping I can convince some friends to go with me in that case. I've even offered to pay for the entry! I really feel like it's the best way to spend money. So that friends are able to participate too. The issue is that this godamn city is gigantic and it takes everyone more than an hour to get to places.
I've been craving sushi....I wanna go to the all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. They have such a reasonable price! But I won't go by myself. They give you a discount if you're with someone else. As soon as one of my friends says they wanna go...we'll see. Everyone (including me) is hella busy and broke. ahhh I wish I still had some relevance on youtube. I was making such good money there in 2024. Crazy how I was insanely depressed n suicidal during the same time I reached peak popularity. DAMN IT! I can't just be a passing trend. I need to try other things. I don't know how much meaning my life will have left if I can't recover from this.